The Bible has quite a bit to say about forgiveness and
unforgiveness. Perhaps the most well-known teaching on unforgiveness is Jesus’
parable of the unmerciful servant, recorded in Matthew 18:21-35. In the
parable, a king forgives an enormously large debt (basically one that could
never be repaid) of one of his servants. Later, however, that same servant
refuses to forgive the small debt of another man. The king hears about this and
rescinds his prior forgiveness. Jesus concludes by saying, “This is how my
heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or
sister from your heart” (Matthew 18:35). Other passages tell us that we will be
forgiven as we forgive (see Matthew 6:14; 7:2; and Luke 6:37, for example).
Do not be confused here; God’s forgiveness is not based on
our works. Forgiveness and salvation are founded completely in the person of
God and by Jesus’ redeeming work on the cross. However, our actions demonstrate
our faith and the extent to which we understand God’s grace (see James 2:14-26
and Luke 7:47). We are completely unworthy, yet Jesus chose to pay the price
for our sins and to give us forgiveness (Romans 5:8). When we truly grasp the
greatness of God’s gift to us, we will pass the gift along. We have been given
grace and should give grace to others in return. In the parable, we are
appalled at the servant who would not forgive a minor debt after having been
forgiven his unpayable debt. Yet, when we are unforgiving, we act just as the
servant in the parable.
Unforgiveness also robs us of the full life God intends for
us. Rather than promote justice, our unforgiveness festers into bitterness.
Hebrews 12:14-15 warns, “Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and
to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one
falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root rises up to cause
trouble and defile many.” Similarly, 2 Corinthians 2:5-11 warns that
unforgiveness can be an opening for Satan to derail us.
We also know that those who have sinned against us – whom we
may not want to forgive – are held accountable by God (see Romans 12:19 and
Hebrews 10:30). It is important to recognize that to forgive is not to downplay
a wrongdoing or necessarily to reconcile. When we choose to forgive, we release
a person from his indebtedness to us. We relinquish the right to seek personal
revenge. We choose to say we will not hold his wrongdoing against him. However,
we do not necessarily allow that person back into our trust or even fully release
that person from the consequences of his sin. We are told that “the wages of
sin is death” (Romans 6:23). While God’s forgiveness relieves us from eternal
death, it does not always release us from the death-like consequences of sin
(such as a broken relationship or the penalty provided by the justice system).
Forgiveness does not mean we act as if no wrong has been done; it does mean we
recognize that grace abundant has been given to us and that we have no right to
hold someone else’s wrongdoing over his head.
Time and again, Scripture calls us to forgive one another.
Ephesians 4:32, for example, says, “Be kind and compassionate to one another,
forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” We have been given
much in the way of forgiveness, and much is expected from us in response (see
Luke 12:48). Though forgiveness is often difficult, to be unforgiving is to
disobey God and to depreciate the greatness of His gift.
Recommended Resource: The Gift of Forgiveness by Charles
Stanley
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